On: In Unprecedented Decision, 7th Graders’ Cruel Facebook Bullying Might Actually Cost – The Parents

A recent post to my Facebook page I thought was worthy of sharing...

Warning: This is real and happening more often than we pick up on. And it does happen around here. Social Media, with Facebook and beyond, is a vast land where all sorts of hate, scorn, judgement, and criticism -- cast through the ill will of an individual -- drown victims and pull down bystanders. A larger concern is that our kids not only learn this from TV and like media but also from the adults and role models in their lives (this may or may not include you as a parent or associated adult, that is up to you to reflect upon).

Adults more and more are using Facebook to cast judgement, to throw stones, whether directly or indirectly (more often indirectly), whether toward individuals or organization, so quick to point out the faults and skeletons of others. What good does this bring?

I believe the world is changing and it seems more and more people strive to divide than to unify, break down than to build up, kick rather than help. As it relates to this Facebook news brief, understand that in education, parents, we are trying to keep up with the evolution of technology, even the evolution of human nature.

Society and education need your help in monitoring what our kids are doing online, as well as what they are doing offline -- they both carry the same weight because on or off line, the behavior is the same. We need your help in showing the way, modeling qualities of critical thinking, problem solving, and most importantly today, conflict resolution. And, of course setting limits and having the difficult conversations you might remember our parents having with us once upon a time. Though they don't always want us, they need us, the structure - the village.

I recently wrote a Facebook Note (that I haven't shared) -- it's purpose was to let my friends and family know why I no longer frequent Facebook, maybe I'll still post it. My reservation is due to the number of people who may be offended as it is difficult to separate my personal opinion from my professional, but maybe that shouldn't matter when it comes to attempting to differentiate behaviors that make society better from behaviors that don't -- it all comes down to problem solving and conflict resolution.

Essentially what I am saying is I'm not sure Facebook is the place to air dirty laundry, to attack individuals and organizations, and to simply complain. Again, what purpose does this serve? Of course, anyone can choose not to follow these types of news feeds, but what I’m proposing is modifying our own behavior to help our children learn healthy ways of interacting with others, of resolving conflict. Leadership is needed in this area! A great deal of leadership!

[For those whose inner chatter is going a mile a minute ready to pounce, "Who in the heck does she think she is, sending this message? Thinking she’s high and mighty? She’s no better than the rest of us. She’s just as flawed as the next! Yea, yea, yea!!" You are RIGHT.]

I am one person, who undoubtedly and humanly make mistakes, but I know my purpose resides in leadership and education. JFK said, “Leadership and learning are indispensable to one another.” Thus, even though I am still a toddler in educational leadership taking in my surroundings, adjusting, living, and learning-inevitably falling down and getting back up, I absolutely believe JFK had it figured out: "The problems with this world cannot possibly be solved by skeptics or cynics whose horizons are limited by the obvious realities. We need people who can dream of things that never were." [John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)]

JFK's beliefs relate to so many problems in life. Together, we can accomplish much, much more. Instead of picking up stones, let's put them together to build a better world. Remember, to build a structure of this sort, it takes many hands, commitment to the goal, and time; it takes a willingness to refrain from judgement and scorn by taking a step back and listening to that inner chatter always circulating in our heads and then doing something constructive with it.

Think before you post. Think before you act. Is it helpful or hurtful? Consider all the eyes watching and learning from your lead (whether online or off). Each of us is a leader - parent, educator, banker, farmer, community member alike. Each of us powerful. What is your purpose? What will you do with your power?

To the video: 
In Unprecedented Decision, 7th Graders’ Cruel Facebook Bullying Might Actually Cost – The Parents

As a Team, We Unite!

First, I want to thank our student body for our respectful behavior while Mr. Samuel Marder was speaking yesterday. I gave you one job and that was to listen with all of your attention on the speaker. Most of you received an A+ - - - Thank you for being engaged, asking questions, and also for starting the standing ovation! Thank you for making everyone proud. You represented us well.

As a team, we unite.

What does your team stand for? 

Image Credit: http://graphicsheat.com/

When I speak of team, I include all of you - from the 8th grade team, the band, the FFA, the Student Council, the staff team to our athletic teams, etc. 

What does your team stand for?

What behaviors and actions can you guarantee within your team?Are they the right ones? Are they ones that will lead your group to success? Are those behaviors and actions ones that build PRIDE, TRADITION, and a POSITIVE REPUTATION for your team? What behaviors and actions can you guarantee within your team? 

Are you committed to your team?
Do you commit yourself in word and in action to the principles and values at the core of your team? Are you committed to your team?

Regardless of whether or not you understand the core values of the many teams you are a part of, you are all a part of one large team, the G-T/R-A TITAN TEAM. And this team has a few key core values.

As Titans this year, we have been asked to focus ourselves on being positive by being solution-oriented problem-solvers and efficient communicators - Each of us was challenged by Will Bowen, founder of "A Complaint Free World" and International Bestselling Author, to be #complaintfree for 21 days (for starters). The G-T/R-A staff are all taking strides to be complaint-free. We have yet to see a large number of students take on the challenge, but I'm very happy to know that a small number of you have accepted the challenge. Imagine the success that will follow from a positive outlook and a constructive way to deal with negativity and problems!

In addition to our complaint-free challenge, we received an additional challenge from Mr. Samuel Marder, Holocaust survivor, and that includes the following:

• Don’t judge others on what they look like, where they come from, who they are, etc …
• Get to a state of mind to where you treat others with kindness and as your own brothers & sisters. 
• Live a life of kindness. 
• Use your power to make the world around you better.

Please remember what Mr. Marder said:

“We are all responsible for each other.
Prejudice is much more dangerous today than it was then.
Kindness will set you free.
THE ONLY SOLUTION IS KINDNESS.”

As a team, we have a responsibility to one another, regardless of the type of team - 

• to take our grumblings to the source, instead of spewing negativity all around you.
• when you have a complaint, bring with it a solution.
• when you communicate, do so respectfully and in kindness.
• be less judgemental and more accepting, after all, not one of us in this room is perfect.
• as Mr. Marder said, don’t judge others at all.
• take pride in yourself and in others, and make your team, your school, and the world a better place.

Sometimes it doesn’t feel like we have much in common with others, other students, other teams or organizations, etc.,
         ....but indeed we do.
   We are one team.

As a team - G-T/R-A Titans - We unite!

                 And when we UNITE, we WIN!

Go TITANS!